Fiera Blog

Some Thoughts on Kissing

As noted here over time, my husband and I are putting more effort into our sex life now that our kids are relatively self-sufficient and let us sleep a lot more than they used to. (Well, now we're up worrying about where they are when they miss their curfews, but at least we can sleep in on weekends to make up for it!) We're doing a pretty good job of giving each other extra attention in the bedroom and with trying to ramp up the romance a bit during the day, but a thing we still need to work on, I think, is kissing.

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Topics: better marriage, couples, improving your marriage, Sex & Relationships, Maintaining the Spark, intimacy

Menopausal Magic Bullet?

 

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Topics: aging, menopause, health, exercisce

“Just Say No” Isn’t The Sex Ed Your Child Needs

In the September issue of the Journal of Adolescent Health, there is a position paper from the Society for Adolescent Health and Medicine on Abstinence-Only-Until Marriage (AOUM) programs that should get every parent thinking about what kind of sex education their kids are receiving in school. Unfortunately, the intention of waiting until marriage to have sex often fails. With the age of marriage rising in the US, most people have sex for the first time as an adolescent or young adult. In fact, research demonstrates that AOUM programs don't delay the first time a young person has sex. In many communities across the US, abstinence-only programs have replaced more comprehensive ones and this is problematic, as we understand that AOUM programs have the following impact[1]:

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Topics: communication, Sex Talk, safe sex, family, education

Let’s Talk About Sex

 I grew up in a buttoned-up New England family, where sex was not only not talked about, it was not acknowledged as a fact of life. I learned everything I needed to know about birds, bees and menstruation from a handful of knowledgeable friends and Judy Blume. It's taken some time, but as an adult, I've become more and more comfortable with discussing sex with both my friends and my partner, since my confidence and shamelessness seem to grow in tandem.

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Topics: sex, relationship, menopause, Sex Talk, marriage, Sex & Relationships, Maintaining the Spark

Feeling Good in All the Ways

I keep thinking and talking and writing lately about how much more confident and comfortable in my skin I am than I was 20 years ago. As a 40-something woman with a history of self-doubt and mild social anxiety, I am proud and happy that this is the case. Gone are the days when I'd freak out about my outfits or make trendy hair choices that did not at all suit me - I finally know what I like and don't care much what anyone thinks about it. Progress!

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Topics: couples, Mind & Body, Sex & Relationships, beauty

Happy Home Hacks: 8 Marriage Tips For The First 9 Months

The time just after marriage is so exciting. You're embarking on your new life together and the horizon looks bright. The memories of your special day are still fresh, and you're newly back from honeymoon. There might even still be wedding gifts to unwrap.

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Topics: communication, improving your marriage, marriage

The HPV Vaccine May Save Your Child’s Life Someday

For many of us, last-minute vacations, school supply shopping, and a visit to the pediatrician herald in the end of our kids' summer. It's also usually around this time when the emails and calls begin to pour in from friends asking whether or not their child should get the Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) vaccine. Sometimes, I can't believe that I am still asked this question, because to me, it's a no-brainer. Unless there is a contraindication, of course your child should get the HPV vaccine! Why wouldn't you protect your child from the most common sexually transmitted infection in the U.S. that causes genital warts as well as various cancers? Well, here are some of the excuses that I am given:

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Topics: sex, Sex Talk, health, sexual heatlh, HPV

Female Sexual Dysunction is a Medical Issue…Period!

The debate over female sexual response has been raging since Masters and Johnson in the 1960's and shows no sign of abating anytime soon. This was made clear during the FDA-approval process of Addyi, a pill for the treatment of Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD), in 2015. The debate that raged in the media at the time, which included input from political pundits, women's health experts, and HSDD sufferers, both fascinated and infuriated me. For what seemed to be a lifetime, they went back and forth on whether HSDD was a disorder developed by pharmaceutical companies to sell a drug and, even if there was a biological origin, whether it warranted medical therapy. One side of the argument believed that HSDD should only be addressed with cognitive and behavioral therapies rather than drug therapy. The opposing side felt that, due to the multifactorial nature of HSDD, this type of approach wasn't always sufficient and that drug therapy should be one of the tools in a clinician's HSDD treatment arsenal. Unfortunately, the debate in the media took away from the important messages that came out of Addyi's approval - that there was finally an FDA-approved therapy for the most common form of female sexual dysfunction (FSD) and that the FDA pledged to support the development of other safe and effective therapies for FSD.

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Topics: Sex Talk, health, sexual function, sexual dysfunction, sexual heatlh

Postpartum sex

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Topics: sex, couples, Mind & Body, postpartum, Sex & Relationships, desire

Better Sex: It Is All in Your Head

When I was younger there were few things more annoying to me than being told something I was suffering with was "all in my head".  Whether I was in pain or beleaguered with self-doubt, my problems were very real to me, and being told they were imaginary or within my control was maddening. As I age, however, I realize how much of my own experience really is within my control, and a lot of it has to do with the dissipation of that very self-doubt I was once afflicted with. Given the age-related changes to my body I'm now experiencing and that my younger self dreaded, I'm surprised to say this positive self-determination extends to sex.

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Topics: sex, better marriage, couples, aging, Mind & Body, Sex Talk, Sex & Relationships
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