Fiera Blog

Some Thoughts on Kissing

Some Thoughts on Kissing.jpg

As noted here over time, my husband and I are putting more effort into our sex life now that our kids are relatively self-sufficient and let us sleep a lot more than they used to. (Well, now we're up worrying about where they are when they miss their curfews, but at least we can sleep in on weekends to make up for it!) We're doing a pretty good job of giving each other extra attention in the bedroom and with trying to ramp up the romance a bit during the day, but a thing we still need to work on, I think, is kissing.

Working on kissing seems counterintuitive, I know - when you're attracted to someone, isn't it just, like, natural? I've always felt that this is the case. But when I think back to my early dating days, there were plenty of full-face suckers and lax-lipped let-downs I'd have loved to give lessons to. My husband and I, on the other hand, clicked possibly because we were fabulous kissers and 25 years later I remember how great our marathon makeout sessions were. So, why aren't we having them anymore?

I think we got used to phoning in sex a bit and kissing was one of the things we let slide. I happen to think this is totally fine - for a while. When you have young kids and work pressures and overly full lives, staying physically connected is so important, but sometimes sex needs to be scheduled and often corners get cut. But you're still there and you're together and you're making the effort for one another. Once life clears out a bit, though, it seems to be the case that couples need to recalibrate their sex lives in order to get some of the magic back. That is where my husband and I are at the moment. I think we're out of kissing practice, and I am vowing to make an effort to bring back the makeout sessions.

My friend told me about Kissing: a Field Guide* which I just bought my husband for his upcoming birthday. I figure it can't hurt, might help, and will be a lot of fun reading and following its tips and advice together.

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Topics: better marriage couples improving your marriage Sex & Relationships Maintaining the Spark intimacy

Written by Fiera

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