Fiera Blog

Rekindling Desire & Reconnecting to What We Want

Desire is the Opposite of Should.

“Desire” and “Should” can’t coexist. “Should” comes from an external place, for example: I should call my mother; I should exercise; I should be more sexy. “Desire” comes from an internal place: I want to call my mom because I want to stay connected to her; I want to exercise because I feel so good after running or dancing hard; I love seeing the joy on my partner’s face when we are intimate. If something comes from desire, it is no longer an obligation and it is easy to act. On the other hand, in the face of “should”, we are recalcitrant, heel-dragging and resentful.  So when something matters to us, but it is in the “should” category, how can we switch gears and reconnect to desire?

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Topics: sex after fifty, Nuelle, marriage

Rekindling Desire & Reconnecting to What We Want

Desire is the Opposite of Should

“Desire” and “Should” can’t coexist. “Should” comes from an external place, for example: I should call my mother; I should exercise; I should be more sexy. “Desire” comes from an internal place: I want to call my mom because I want to stay connected to her; I want to exercise because I feel so good after running or dancing hard; I love seeing the joy on my partner’s face when we are intimate. If something comes from desire, it is no longer an obligation and it is easy to act. On the other hand, in the face of “should”, we are recalcitrant, heel-dragging and resentful.  So when something matters to us, but it is in the “should” category, how can we switch gears and reconnect to desire?

Read More
Topics: sex after fifty, Nuelle, marriage
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